Checkmate!

Pretty sure I’ve mentioned lots of times that the Dog Walker is trying to earn all the Merit Badges offered by the Boy Scouts of America. This is a huge deal for him and we are on the brink of accomplishment!

We had it all planned out…last Sunday was the Court of Honor and badges were presented. The Dog Walker received 17. The plan was to have him earn all of the badges except one. Then we could schedule his final Court of Honor/Party and he would be extremely cool!

So things were rolling according to plan. We scheduled his party for September 11 and sent out the invitations last week. The blue cards were in and the badges were done. One of the things he has always wanted to do is give a gift to each counselor or person who really helped him achieve his goal. So last week we went over to Beck’s Leather and Craft. We had arranged with them to make 100 key chains (at an amazing price!). It took us a while to stamp them with an eagle, then cover each one with a satin sheen.

When we got home, I got online to print a list of badges so we could put a counselor’s name with each one. As I was scrolling through the list, formatting it to make things easy, my eyes read each name…American Business, American Labor…Basketry, Chess, Climbing…wait a second. I was stunned to see a badge that we had not earned! Chess was never on the list…what’s up with that?

I punched in the keys for Meritbadge.org. Sure enough, it was a new badge and its release date was scheduled for September 10, one day before we were planning to share with our friends and family the Dog Walker’s successful achievement of a goal that he had not quite completed because now there was a new badge. This was not good.

After several stressful moments, I discovered that the requirements would be released online on September 7. In the meantime, we are playing lots of Chess at our house. I’m the resident Chess Champion here, although maybe that’s not saying much. I keep telling the Dog Walker that I got pretty good because my older brother beat me for over 100 straight games. You can learn a lot by losing…

That doesn’t make him feel any better when the only person he has managed to beat has been Prima Donna. Sport is actually pretty good. He even beat my sweetie today (with just a tiny bit of help). So, as long as we can anticipate most of the requirements, we will be celebrating next Sunday after the Dog Walker passes off his last badge and then the newly released last badge. If not…checkmate!

My brain hurts!

Girl Scouts

If you have read my blog for any length of time, you know that I love working with the scouts! I have been a Girl Scout leader for 18 years (with no end in sight…). I figure I can retire from scouts the same time my sweetie retires from his job unless I have some granddaughters by then who happen to need a leader.

I’ve told you a bunch of our adventures this year including our trip to the zoo. We also took all the girls to an outdoor theater and watched the musical Camp Rock. We had a sleepover and tied a quilt for Teach’s Relay for Life team. We planted trees and went swimming. We played basketball and volleyball and we learned how to paint with pastels and use a compass. We even made jewelry and learned how to play jacks!



So this past week we had our Annual Awards Family Picnic for the girls and their families. My sweetie dragged his event-sized BBQ grill over to the bowery and grilled burgers and dogs for everyone. We invited some of our girls to show off their amazing scouting skills and we sang camp songs. Then we formed the promise circle and sang “Make New Friends.” It’s sort of like the Kumbaya of Girl Scouts in Utah. My girls were excited to receive their awards and bridge to the next scouting level. I was excited to be finished until October.

The best part of Girl Scouts is the cookies (but not selling them) and working with the girls. Every year I question my sanity, but I still send in my paperwork and make up a calendar. I can’t tell you the number of times I’ve thought about quitting. Trying to convince these very different girls that we have to be a “sister to every Girl Scout” is hard!

Most girls only stay with scouts for a few years and then they move on to other things. There are so many good activities (and lots of bad ones too) competing for our time and energy. I’ve told you before that I have a secret wish…I want all my girls to earn their Gold Awards and all my boys to earn the Eagle Scout. So far I have five of the twelve who have made it.
 

My secret fear is that I will get too tired and old to help them be what they want to be. I’m 46 now and Baby Doll is not even a year old yet. When she graduates from high school, I will be 64! It makes me tired just thinking about it. Does anybody have any idea where I can find the Fountain of Youth? I may just need it…and a couple dozen boxes of Thin Mints.

Easy as Riding a Bike

The Dog Walker was almost 13 the summer he learned to ride a two-wheeler. It was the same summer we tried for the umpteenth time to teach the Drama Queen to ride a bike. She tried her best, but after two or three falls and some nasty scrapes and bruises, she gave up and went in the house. Even the threat of losing her beloved Mustang wasn’t enough to get her to come back outside.

That left just my sweetie, me, and the Dog Walker. Princess was riding up and down the street behind us, making it all look too easy. The Dog Walker was frightened and frustrated. After a dozen trips running beside him, holding onto the seat, and watching him pedal a few feet on his own and then crash, we were all ready to quit. My sweetie used words then that we have repeated many times over the last 7 years… “You’ll never earn all the Merit Badges if you don’t…learn to ride a bike.” Only a year into his goal, the Dog Walker could not stand the thought of failure. He threw himself onto the ground next to his bike and burst into tears. He sobbed for about 5 minutes while my sweetie and I retreated to the porch. We watched him silently for a moment, then offered a fervent prayer. After the tears were gone, he hauled himself up and with a determined look that I have also seen many times over the years, he climbed back on that bike. After two or three more tries and fails, he finally sailed passed us. He had the biggest grin on his face…he was actually riding a bike!

I saw that same determination today. He and my sweetie left the house about 6:30 this morning to head out to the Miller Sportspark. It was the day of the big Charity Run. The Dog Walker was able to raise $177.00 in donations (thanks to all of you who helped with that!) and he was determined to ride the 50 miles required to complete his Cycling Merit Badge. We planned to stagger our arrivals times, thinking that would give him a fresh burst of energy so that he could keep his wheels turning. He hit the track at 8:00, wearing his scout uniform and riding his trusty mountain bike. There were 108 riders, and most of them could easily put in 100 miles. He started out slowly with the first lap taking almost 15 minutes. Apparently the ride wasn’t as flat as we were hoping. My sweetie started to panic, worrying that at that rate he wouldn’t be able to complete 50 miles in the allotted 8 hours.

The next two or three laps were better and by the time I arrived with all the little brothers and sisters at 10:30, he had nearly completed 9 laps. It was a three-mile course, so he was more than halfway done, but it was obvious that he was getting tired. After lap 10, he came in to the pits. He was tired and sweaty, but still determined to make the 50 miles. He had never ridden more than 32 miles in a single day before and the temperature was climbing. We found out later that it got up to 106 degrees!

After a 20-minute break, I sent him back to complete three more rounds. Our plan was for him to break then, ride two more, then break and then finish the last two. After he hit 13, he joined us under the canopy and ate a pb&j and drank a Powerade. “Somebody wants to ride with me…” he said. My sweetie confirmed that he was babbling to himself when he finished the 13th lap and the guys downstairs were worried. The Dog Walker often talks to himself, so we didn’t get too stressed. He headed back to the track.

A nice young woman from the Miller family came by to talk with me. She assured me that they would not shut down the track until my son had completed his goal. When he passed us again, he was riding with someone. By this time, many of the racers had completed their rides and were heading home. We cleaned up our lunch and waited patiently for him to pass by again. It was lap 15 and time for his last break. After a while, I started getting nervous. I walked down the stairs to the pit and found the woman who had spoken with me before. “Oh don’t worry,” she said. “Roger is with him. He’ll be fine.” Roger was one of the owners of the Sportspark. Apparently they had already come in for their last break and we had missed them. He only had a lap and a half left to go!

We quickly cleaned up the rest of our stuff. Prima Donna had made little signs that we held up as he passed by for the last time. Then we stowed the remains of lunch and the stroller in the van and headed for the finish line. By the time we got there he had about a half of a lap left. Our friendly young woman said, “The Miller Racing Team has gone out to escort him the rest of the way in.” The kids were SOO excited. We waited for a few minutes and then moved onto the track. The racing team came in first (veeery slooowly) and the Dog Walker came around the last turn. Everybody on the track was cheering and shouting for him. Even from a distance I could see that look in his eye, that determination…and finally, as he sprinted on his bike that last 50 yards, the big grin! Only three more badges to go…

Camping

In 2008 when the Dog Walker was fourteen, he was all excited about finishing his merit badges to earn his Eagle Scout award. It takes 21 badges to earn the Eagle and some of them are required. One of the hardest is Camping. Camping was one of the original 57 badges created in 1911, and to earn it a scout has to spend 20 days and 20 nights camping either with his troop or his family. 

Family campout 2010

We started keeping track when the Dog Walker was an 11-year-old scout. For each trip he would either take pictures and log the dates or draw pictures of what they did while they were camping. He got five days each for his 12 and 13-year-old scout camps, so that gave him a pretty good jump. Fathers and sons times three years, plus several family camping trips and he was at 19. We were excited about this, knowing that with the May Fathers and sons camp he would be at the required 20. That same weekend we made an appointment with the counselor and showed up on his doorstep with all the requirements. 

Dog Walker

The Dog Walker proudly presented all of his pages and dates to the counselor (who also happened to be his scout leader). Everything was perfect except for one thing…we didn’t have enough campouts. "But we counted so carefully," I protested. Our very patient scout leader pointed to each individual camp and ticked up the numbers. When he got to the second scout camp, instead of assigning it multiple days, he only counted it as one! Apparently you only get the full number of nights the first time you go to scout camp. The Dog Walker was devastated. 

We headed back home and my brain was churning. Once again, I was seven months pregnant with Curly and not excited about the prospects of doing any camping. Unfortunately, there weren’t many other options for us. So we pulled out the calendar and planned a trip to a nearby campsite for the first weekend in June. It seemed pretty silly to haul all of our stuff 20 miles down the road just so we could sleep in a tent, but that’s exactly what we did. 

Pic credit

Willow Park was a huge flat area with some trees, a playground, and lots of mosquitoes. We pitched the tent in the center of all of them. There weren’t many other people around that particular evening and we found out later that it is because they chose that day to spray the area with pesticides. Somebody came around and warned us to stay in our tent between 5 and 6 in the morning…. 

Anyway, we camped as close to the nearest restroom as possible, but I had been getting up four or five times every night and even that 300 feet to the restroom seemed impossible. I slept in my clothes with my shoes at the ready. I spent several minutes in fervent prayer, asking for intervention so that I would be able to make it through the night even though I hadn’t been able to for several months. As I drifted off, one last trip down the road seemed like a grand idea. 

The next thing I knew, the sun was up and it was morning. My bladder was definitely urging me to get up and quickly, but the kids were already stirring and it was time to start breakfast. I am so grateful for these small and simple things that remind me that even the seemingly impossible can be accomplished if you believe in the power of prayer. 

Autism: Scouts

Part seven in our story on Autism.  If you are new and would like to catch up start here.

So the question was, " How do I teach my autistic son about life in general? How do I give him goals and dreams?" The answer was Scouts. The problem was that he HATED scouts! He started as a Cub Scout when he was 8 years old. The den meetings were OK, but the pack meetings were terrible. He was afraid to get up in front of people. At first I let him stay in his seat and the cubmaster would bring his awards to him, but after a while that sort of favoritism was not sitting well with the other boys. So I forced him out of his seat when his name was called. A couple of times he threw an absolute tantrum on the floor, rolling and screaming and crying. Those were the days his dad would pick him up (he was too heavy for me) and carry him out in the hall until he could settle down. But after a while he started going up (as long as I went with him) and simply turning his back on the audience. 

He earned all of his cub awards and many arrowheads. By the time he became an 11-year-old scout I started pushing the merit badges. He was learning about all kinds of things and scouts was becoming a little easier. Then one day in the paper I saw a boy who had earned all the badges. I showed the article to my Dog Walker. I underestimated his desire for fame and recognition. He immediately set the goal to earn all 124 of the badges and he had to do it before his 18^th birthday. Imagine my surprise when I started looking through the list! This was not going to be easy…Aviation, Water Sports, Golf, Reptile and Amphibian Study…the Scoutmaster thought he’d pull a fast one and he even listed me as a counselor on that one (he knew I hated snakes!). 

We started slowly, working on the ones he needed for his Eagle first. Because it was difficult for him to learn in a straight line, we started making scrapbooks for each badge. We took lots of pictures and he copied thousands of words out of the Merit Badge handbooks to help him when he went to visit his counselors. He would work on one for a little while, then switch off and start on another one. Sometimes it took him a couple of years to finish one up, but because he had a record, it wasn’t hard for him to come back later and finish. He earned many badges at various scout camps, but I made him work the hardest at home. 

Some of these badges were definitely life-changing, like getting a dog for the Dog Care badge and signing up for band so he could earn the Bugling badge. Sometime I’ll tell you about our specific adventures earning other badges, like our trip to Denver for the Whitewater badge. For the past six years, earning merit badges has been a huge deal around here. He currently has 120 badges and only 8 months until his 18^th birthday. I’d like to say that 124 is still the magic number, but you know how scouts likes to yank us around. There are currently 130 that he is eligible to earn. At the last Court of Honor he actually got up and spoke to all the boys about the four historic merit badges that were only available for 2010. He encourages the other boys to work hard and get their own awards. 

1910 Historic Merit Badges

He loves scouts and any time I ask him to do something hard he will say, "Is it for a merit badge?" If I can figure out a way that it is, I don’t have any arguments from him. So the question is, "Can an autistic boy set goals and achieve them?" The answer is, "Absolutely!"

Anything You Can Do...

I gave you a teaser yesterday in my post about my two older brothers, now Bossy says I’d better explain myself. When I was a child, our house was full of the competitive spirit. I have seven siblings, three brothers and four sisters. This provided plenty of opportunity to try to "one-up" each other. 

My parents encouraged us to work hard and value education. I remember bringing home a report card with all A grades and one A-. There was no "Good job! Nice report card." It was "Why did you get an A-?" My parents also believed that comparing kids with each other made them work harder. Nobody wanted to be the biggest slacker! And for the most part, it worked. 

My oldest brother was the amazingly brilliant one. It all came so easy for him.  He was Valedictorian, received cool scholarships, accepted only the highest possible grades without ever studying, traveled the world, earned a PhD at Cornell, wrote books, and finally landed a prestigious position at the University of Canterbury in Christchurch, New Zealand. He eventually even got the girl when he married at age 38 and had an incredibly brilliant daughter of his own. (He’s losing his hair first too, so that’s got to be worth something!) 

My next brother also had very high grades because he worked extremely hard, received nice scholarships, traveled the world, earned a PhD from UCLA, wrote books, and landed a prestigious position at the University in Chiba, Japan (sorry, I don’t know the name of your school!). He has a beautiful wife and three extremely talented kids (OK, the two boys play an amazing game of basketball…) and his little girl can only dribble down her chin (so far! She just turned one.). 

Then there’s me…but for now, let’s focus on the competition that goes on between these two brothers of mine. Perhaps you can see a few similarities in the paths they have followed? Both played tennis in high school and were state champions. Watching a tennis match between the two of them was a lot like watching them succeed in life. Japan 15, New Zealand 30, Advantage Japan, Game, Set, Match! They were working hard for the same things. Both were Eagle Scouts, missionaries, ESL teachers in other countries. Both married later in life (I think they had a pact of some kind). 

As kids they weren’t always the best of friends. I remember them fighting one night and running through the glass window of our front door. I’m pretty sure that one ended in stitches. Actually, I’m pretty sure that happened twice! But as brothers they were always close. New Zealand was a bit of a nerd in elementary school and Japan ended up in the principal’s office many times for beating up the kids who picked on his older brother. 

©: FOX

 This has been the hardest blog I have written. I have been so worried that their competitive spirits might misinterpret my intentions somehow and make them feel that I care more for one than the other or that I think one has been more amazing than the other. They are two of my heroes and even though I like to tease them a little, I’m very proud of the amazing men they have become. But just because one of you did something doesn’t mean the other one has to copy every time. Japan clearly won the earthquake competition...now can’t we just do something easy? Like stealing the moon or maybe a race to Mars? 

©:Dreamworks

Secret Goal

I have this secret goal for all of my kids. It was one of those that sort of evolved after the first few kids. Our Gym Rat was only 15 when he earned his Eagle Scout. Even though they lost his paperwork for a year and he had long outgrown his scout uniform so I had to buy a new one, I was so proud to watch him receive that Eagle Scout pin and speak at his own Court of Honor. 

Bossy became a Girl Scout at age 9. They didn’t have Girl Scouts in my hometown, so I was not at all familiar with the program. I learned quickly that if you wanted to put your kid in a troop, you had to be a troop leader. So being a kind, ever-loving, long-enduring masochistic martyr, I signed on as the leader. Thus began my love/hate relationship with scouts. Mostly I love it, but on Friday mornings when I’m madly cleaning the house and preparing my lesson for 10 restless little girls I sometimes wonder why I volunteered for such misery. Anyway, I stuck with the Girl Scout thing, not always as the Troop Leader, but always involved with cookie sales or as an assistant leader. 

So Bossy moved through the program, earning every possible pin and award (because that’s her personality!). I wasn’t surprised when after Silver she moved on to her Gold Award. A Gold Award is the equivalent of the Eagle Scout for girls. That’s when I decided it would be cool for all of my kids to receive the highest awards available in scouting. Of course I didn’t have nearly this many kids when I thought that…we’ll see if I poop out before they get that old. As of now our oldest five children have managed to make my goal. I’ll keep you posted on the rest…Princess and Prima Donna have both earned their Silver Award so they are well on their way. Only 10,000 boxes of cookies, 1,000 hours of service, and 100 merit badges to go.  Makes me tired just thinking about it.