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When we were kids, my parents figured the best way to raise a bunch of Super-Over-Achievers was to put them in constant competition with each other. And I suppose it worked to a certain degree...except that I always came out of everything feeling resentful and like I wasn't good enough. Or if I did come out on top, I was boastful and irritating. This didn't exactly lend itself to a harmonious home environment.
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Now I don't even pretend to know all there is to know about motherhood. In fact, the older I get, the more I realize just how clueless I am. But people comment all the time about how well my kids get along with each other and that's because in everything we do, family is most important.
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On our recent trip to Vernal, we were horsing around in the pool at the hotel. The Prima Donna thought it might be fun to dunk Sport. He didn't think so...he came up sputtering and bawling. My sweetie thought she ought to be sentenced to a deck chair for ten minutes. No way! That was too easy. I told her she had to haul Sport around the entire pool on her back three times. She grumbled a little at first, but by the second lap they were laughing and playing and having a good time.
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I also encourage my kids to serve each other. In the book "Cheaper by the Dozen," they talk about assigning an older child to a younger child to make sure things happen. I am a great delegator! For a while we had specific olders assigned to specific youngers, but now I like to mix it up so they all get a chance to help each other.
I am constantly on the prowl for problems and broken relationships so I can help the kids repair them. I want their siblings to be their best friends.
How do you keep your kids from fighting?