47 Years

It's my birthday today.

I'm 47 years old. Where did the time go?

Make a wish!

We've always had chemistry

 


Some days I remember 17 so clearly. I was a senior at Manti high school with an amazing GPA and a small part of myself in half a dozen projects. I was in the chamber choir, a member of the Close Up team, on the youth city council, a writer for the local newspaper, yearbook staff, AND I was also a Sophomore at Snow College leading a totally separate life. I was the Feature Page editor for the school paper we published every other week; on two scholarships while I was still in high school. And I ran myself 20 hours a day...played hard, worked hard, still managed to meet and fall in love with my sweetie, dreamed of running away, and only slept on the weekends.

Me with Little, Snoozin' Drama Queen. 

 
When I was 27, I was working three jobs and had 4 little ones at home. I hardly saw them. I worked for 8 hours in the office, then ran home to grab a bite, say hello to the tiny strangers around my dinner table, kiss my sweetie in passing, and then it was off to a Tupperware party, some training meeting, or a writing class I was teaching. At the very least, I was making cold calls and trying to keep my business afloat and take care of the 50+ consultants who were on my team. We just couldn't risk losing the van Tupperware had given us. Sleep was precious and I loved snuggling with those little ones on early Sunday mornings, still dreaming of running away together, but then the phone would ring...

Look at my teeny Prima Donna!

By 37 I was much older and wiser. I was up to 8 kids and enjoying motherhood, even the teenager part. Bossy was the senior in high school. Crafty was 1. I had shed the jobs one by one and even most of the volunteer positions. My sweetie sat me down and taught me how to say the word, "NO!" when someone asked me to run the PTA, the Reflections program, or the Girl Scouts Service Unit. Involvement was good, but only up to a certain point. My kids were no longer strangers (a little strange, maybe), and we loved just playing and being together. We figured out the running away part and enjoyed our first real family vacations by taking a trip to San Francisco. Sleep was still elusive, but then I wasn't quite so tired either.



And now here I am at 47.


A grandma, momof12, blogger, Tupperware lady (again!), wife, daughter, scout leader, coach, teacher, friend. I think my personality requires many hats and many activities. I still don't know if I'm doing it right, but I'm doing it! I hate dragging myself out of bed every morning, but I'm grateful that I CAN still get out of bed every morning. I love being a mom and I wish I would have learned at 27 that family was the most important thing. I'm pretty sure I always knew, but somewhere along the line my little ones were simply another box to check off on my to-do list. Thankfully that was a short lesson that I have mostly learned. (Although late at night when I am checking in with my blogging friends, I kind of wonder if I've really learned it that well...).

I still dream of running away, but now I always want to take everyone with me. And I still love snuggling in bed on a cold January morning. And I don't care if the phone rings...