Sep 11, 2019

Happy Anniversary to Us!

Tuesday, September 10, was our 36th wedding anniversary. I think we were just looking for ways to feel young, because we took Little Warrior and Twizlet to the zoo. My sweetie had a meeting he couldn't miss, so we didn't get away until after lunch.

 When we arrived at the zoo, it had just started drizzling on our car, but the people were leaving in droves with their little ones. By the time we got the wagon set up and made our way to the almost deserted front gates, we pretty much had the place to ourselves.

We caught a peek of the giraffes just as they were rushed into their indoor viewing area. There was a fair amount of lightning and I'm sure they just didn't want them to get hurt.

We didn't get to see all the animals, but the ones we did see seemed playful and excited to be in the limelight. 

They shut down the train because of the lightning, but not the carousel, so we took the opportunity to ride it as much as possible. My sweetie said he counted 7 times, but I'm not sure about the number since I hurried to the gift shop to buy the kids a couple of warm cute jackets.

We left the zoo just in time to stop at McDonald's before we had to be home for the evening chasing around. It was a fun trip and I'm thinking we should always go in the rain, but next time we need to take the other grandbabies...


Bossy said...

Not Skittles or any of Bossy and Gamer's kids. You value being right over an apology and prefer to pretend like things are fine when they aren't.

The Biggest Brother said...

Bossy, I know you and mom are in a little disagreement right now and I don't think publicly posting on mom's blog is the right place to discuss it, but you brought it here and so I'm not going to be a spectator.

I'm not going to take sides because you're both right and you're both wrong. In life it really doesn't matter what your intentions are what matters is how you make the other person feel. You feel like mom doesn't appreciate the errands you run for her. Mom feels like you don't communicate well enough before dropping your kids off at her house for free daycare. You are both right to feel the way you do, but I'm also positive that both of you originally did the activities you did out of love. You wanted to help mom, you went out of your way to do something nice and when you didn't receive praise you felt unappreciated. That sucks. We've all felt that. Yesterday I bought a coworker a dr pepper when they dropped theirs in the elevator, they never said thank you. That doesn't mean that they didn't feel gratitude or feel loved, likely what happened was they got caught up in the day and never got around to it. I'm sure this is similar to what happened with mom, she is after all one of the busiest people we know.

Mom wanted to help you with daycare and did for a LONG time completely for free. All of us have to some extent abused that privilege and mom was watching much more than she agreed to, I'm not in any way saying it was just you, I'm saying several of us have kids and we all love free daycare. Mom's request for $5 an hour had nothing to do with the money and you know that, it had to do with us putting more thought into WHEN we asked for daycare rather than just feeling like it was our right as a Christensen. It all comes back to the same thing, mom felt unappreciated.

Life isn't a checkbook, if you try to find balance every day you're always going to be upset. I can tell you with 100% confidence that the only way this comes to a happy conclusion is if you both come to the realization that you love each other, you value the effort each other puts in and at the end of the day you are both just trying your best. This will be the outcome, whether it's today or a year from now this will be what happens so why keep perpetuating the problem? Why not talk to each other peacefully and come to a solution? It doesn't matter what that is, even if you decide you're better off not working together that's ok! We don't have to go for family for everything, but continuing to hold a grudge is the most exhausting and worthless activity any of us participate in. Forgiving others their shortcomings is the most freeing and positive feeling we can give ourselves. You taught me that. Remember last year when you asked me why I couldn't forgive you for some of the things that happened when we were kids? It made me realize that be bringing up those past stories it brought up pain within you. You're not that person anymore, and by retelling those stories and teasing you about it I harbored negative feelings between us. I have personally chastised several people since then for bringing up old stories. I am your number 1 fan, you've changed SOO much since becoming a mom 15 or so years ago, I'm sorry it took me that long to stop teasing you about the past and to finally just let go of that last little hold that I had in teasing you. I know that you can do the same. Any hard feelings you have towards mom only will hurt you. You can't move on until you let go of all of it, appreciate what mom has done for you, and know that we are all just trying our best.

LeAnn said...

Happy Anniversary to the two of you! it looks like you had a fabulous time with those cute little ones. Hugs for all~