Pages

Sep 19, 2011

A Legacy of Love

Edna Benson: March 24, 1918 - Sept 18, 2011
Today started out to be a typical crazy day, but it didn’t end that way. We had my siblings and their families coming over to celebrate Grandpa’s birthday. My sweetie spent the entire morning making Grandpa’s favorite food, spaghetti and (huge!) meatballs. Crafty absolutely loves meatballs! When she was about 7, she heard the “On Top of Spaghetti” song for the first time. Strangely, she started to cry. “What’s wrong?” my sweetie asked. “That’s the saddest song I ever heard…” she whimpered. My sweetie started going over the lyrics in his head. Perplexed, he finally asked her why. “Because somebody’s meatball rolls into the street and becomes nothing but mush,” she sobbed.

So back to my day…we headed out for church and we were running behind because of all the party preparations. I accidentally left my cell phone on the couch. After three rather quiet hours at church, we drove home.

The Drama Queen had opted to stay home rather than show up late, and I was a bit surprised when she met us at the car door. She was upset and clearly agitated. “What’s wrong?” I asked immediately. “I don’t know if you want the kids to know,” she said hesitantly. “Tell me,” I insisted. “Your sister called and Grandma died this morning.” I had been dreading this day for the last 20 years, and now that it was here, the tears did not flow. Grandma was 93 last March and she was so unhappy with her failing body. Oh, she was never sickly, but she just couldn’t do the things she wanted to do anymore. She gave me her quilt frames last winter when she knew she wouldn’t be able to set them up anymore. She was always a small woman, but she was now about the same size as 8-year-old Sport, although I think she weighed about 20 lbs less than he does. She loved cats and dogs and thought everybody should have one.

Grandma and I were always close. I took my sweetie to meet my grandparents on our very first date. My mom used to complain that Grandma was more like a mother to me than she was and I have to admit that Grandma taught me many things. I learned how to cook and clean from her. I learned about budgeting and the power of money. She taught me to quilt and crochet, how to make a bed. Couponing and even how to address an envelope. She taught me about forgiveness and stubborness and how to get along. How to wrap a gift and how to work hard! How to play Pinochle and Yahtzee. Grandma was one of my heroes.
Teach and I were talking about her legacy and Teach took some pics for you of things that help her remember Grandma. These beautiful hot pads, dish cloths, and quilts were some of her contributions. For Grandma it was important to keep busy and productive. I’m guessing they had to pry that crochet hook out of her hand this afternoon before they took her to the funeral home. It was just her way. She gave this necklace to Teach and it is one of her prized possessions. Princess loves her quilts, all made with love by Grandma. I have many fond memories that have nothing to do with yarn, like the day she asked me to dye her hair.

She loved bright colors, but not pink. When we first moved into our home, I told her our color scheme and she whipped up half a dozen pink hot pads for us. Everyone on my street has a couple of hot pads and dish cloths that were lovingly made by Grandma. Every new baby was wrapped in one of Grandma's quilts. We've given away hundreds over the years.


 I called my sisters after church. None of us knew what to do. Then we decided to do just exactly what Grandma would have wanted. We had a party! Albeit a somber party. We gathered at my house at the appointed time, munched on meatballs and talked about Grandma. She would have liked that. I’m not sure what the week will bring. But I do know I will miss her. Last week Teach bought some yarn so Grandma could crochet a few more baby dresses. It's still sitting in the Roberts bag. Should I return it? Who is going to run over the pop cans with their car now that Grandma is gone? And who is going to keep score when we play Pinochle? Even though I know she was done here, and all of her friends died years ago, it is difficult to let her go. She outlived two husbands and her daughter (my mom). She hasn’t been truly happy for quite some time although she never complained much. And yes, Teach, much of her legacy involved yarn, but it is much more than that. It is a legacy of love.















12 comments:

  1. Sorry to hear of the passing of your grandma, thank God she can dance freely now and her body isn't failing her! What wonderful memories you have of her both in memory and tangible memories.

    ReplyDelete
  2. It still dosent seem real, it wouldnt seem like it was that big of a deal, but it is... it really is

    ReplyDelete
  3. Sorry to hear of your loss. She sounds like an amazing woman that will live on in the hearts on many. My Grandma just passed away less than a month ago :(

    ReplyDelete
  4. She sounds like an amazing woman. I'm so sorry for your loss.

    ReplyDelete
  5. I'm so sorry for your loss! She sure sounds like an amazing woman! And I love that your daughter took pictures of the things that remind her of her Grandma. What a sweet way to remember her. :]

    ReplyDelete
  6. I am sorry for your loss. I live with my Grandmother right now and feel blessed for the time I get to spend with her.

    ReplyDelete
  7. Grandmothers are so wonderful. Sorry for your loss, but know she is in a better place.
    On a happier note, I love your Crafty Meatball story. =]

    ReplyDelete
  8. I am so sorry for your loss, Grandmothers are special people and it is hard letting them go even when we know they are happier and in a better place. We will be keeping your family in our thoughts and prayers.

    ReplyDelete
  9. Sorry for your loss. I will be thinking about you and your family!

    ReplyDelete
  10. Very sorry for your loss of your beloved Grama..My Grama was an enormous influence on my life, I lived with her for nearly 2 years and she passed to God 10 days before I graduated from college, she lived to see me graduate and God let her come to live with Him..I saw the story on the nightly news with Brian Williams about your son, they showed a picture of you..You look great and are so very proud of your child, how wonderful he got all those badges and did all those things, just took a lot longer and he tried harder..very inspirational..Too bad Mothers are not like you, loving and nuturing your children adoring their husbands and loving and sweet to their family!!!!!!!!!!! I have always thought that faith and family should always be the most important but many shrug off my opinions, we would have fewer kids in juvenile facilities, homeless siblings, veterans and many families, if their families were connected and kind, loving and accepting..I truly beleive this to be the truth!!!!!!! Keep up the blog, it is very helpful, love the recipes and your musings on your family and your faith you don't proseltize, but live your faith daily..remember your Grama is still with you in your heart and guiding you and loving you too..ciao..........

    ReplyDelete
  11. What an amazing lady, and what a wonderful legacy of crafts and memories she left!

    ReplyDelete
  12. I am so sorry for your loss. My grandfather passed away this past April and even though he was 88, it was still hard.

    He was the one to teach me to play chess. And then he was the only one who could beat me.

    www.librarianmom.com

    ReplyDelete