Three Strikes and I'm Wiped Out

Yesterday I was sitting in church during our first meeting and Baby Doll elected to fill her diaper and then be ornery about it. So I took her out to the changing room, got her fixed up, gave her a little milk, and rejoined the family.

In our church we have three hours of meetings for everyone on Sunday, and each one is about an hour. We left our first meeting and headed for the second. About 10 minutes into that one, she pooped again. So I took her out again, changed her diaper, gave her a little more milk, and rather than disrupt class again, waited in the hall until it was over.

While I was waiting, I was joined by the Bishop’s wife. She was carrying a large container of Red Vines licorice and offered one to Baby Doll. Now my little girl loves red licorice and she was wearing a red dress. It didn’t seem like a bad idea until I remembered I was wearing a white blouse! Red juice oozed from her little hands as she happily sucked/chewed on the piece of licorice. I turned her this way and that to keep those little hands from grabbing my clothes.

We finally entered the last classroom with only a small stain and I quickly sat down and retrieved a wipe from the diaper bag. She grabbed it from me so I pulled another one from the box. I figured she could wipe her own hands a little while I rubbed the red goo from my arms and hands. After about 30 seconds, she bit off a piece of the wipe. I fished it out of her mouth and tossed it in the diaper bag just as she bit off the second piece. People were starting to snigger around us. Me gathering bits of wipe as she tore it into smaller and smaller bites. I finally got the whole thing away from her and stowed safely away.

Then the lady teaching the class passed around a basket full of mint chocolate chip cookies. I took one and carefully broke off a small piece for Baby Doll. But instead of being grateful, she grabbed the big piece and shoved it in her mouth! Pretty soon we were smeared with chocolate cookie crumbs and mint chips. Dare I admit that I pulled out the wipes again?

After a failed attempt to clean her up, I sniffed that familiar aroma…I gathered up the diaper bag, wipe shreds, Baby Doll, and headed for the changing room for the third time. I changed her diaper, washed her smucky little fingers, and then mopped myself with a couple of wipes. Then I dug in her diaper bag until I found the remains of the bag of Cheerios. (The good ones, not the ones that ended up inside my sweetie’s shoes during Sacrament meeting.) I proceeded to down the entire bag! Not sugar, but desperate times call for desperate measures…Baby Doll didn’t mind…she’d found another wipe.